Saturday, 11 October 2014
Swimming Techniques When You've Got Four Legs
Last summer we took the puppies swimming at Lago di Fiastra in Italy and discovered that doggy paddles differ. Taia the husky took to the water like a fish, in fact we didn't even hear a splash when she went in, I simply turned round and some husky-sized, white, fluffy driftwood floated by. Mischa however was a different story. With every stick thrown into the lake, there was a scene reminiscent of a fully clothed Eskimo drowning. OK, she was moving forward in the water but there were definitely no points for style. I tried giving her some tips but just got this look!
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| Mischa's reaction to swimming tips. |
Currency Clichés
Last week I meandered over the border into Switzerland for the day and in Lugano got my hands on some Swiss francs for the first time.
As with any new currency, I took a minute to give it the once over and it dawned on me how much the local money actually says about a country. Whether it's euros or rupees, I realised that every type of currency gives you a little insight into the country and it's mentality and to prove my point, I spent a Sunday morning compiling a list and dribbling egg yolk on my keyboard...
- The Swiss Franc
Cuckoo clocks, toblerones, army knives, bank accounts and neutrality are all things the Swiss are extremely good at. Deciding on a single colour for their banknotes is a bit more demanding. Much like the country's non-committal approach to military affairs or a single language, Swiss francs can't quite decide what colour they want to be. What colour is a 10 franc note? Yellow, with blue...and white...and orange...a little violet...and maybe a smudge of green...
Non-committal but very pretty....
- The Pound Sterling
Regal by appearance but inherently weak. Put a fiver in the washing machine and the Queen comes out the other end looking like Ghandi. One of the few currencies where sellotape plays a vital role and is widely accepted. Although if it's a Scottish or Northern Irish pound then forget spending it in England, sellotaped or not...
- The Euro
Stylish pastel shades, classical motifs and durability...The old world in money form. The Eurocrats in Brussels came up with notes that not only represent old Europe but also the new. Size and denomination show the power divide as the financial big boys in Frankfurt thumb through giant 50's and 100's whilst the monetary minnows are left with midget sized 5's. However, if they really want to articulate modern Europe then the Greek & the Irish coins should probably snap in half every now and again...
- New Zealand Dollar
The kiwi dollar is a piece of 1970's New Zealand. From a time when mutton and butter dominated the kiwi economy and life was beige in extremus. Exotic life was hinted at with pictures of Hillary & Everest but cardigans were king.
- Australian Dollar
The Aussie dollar, simple, sturdy and instantly recognisable for what it is, just like an outback dunny. A little see-through window provides hours of potential entertainment and it's plastic coating means you can go for a swim with your cash. Extremely practical...
- U.S. Dollar
If banknotes were a representation of a country then America would be the land of long, skinny, elderly white men with bad hair. Disneyland Florida proves the skinny part to be unfounded and Obama has given America a new face which leaves the dollar looking slightly archaic.
Perhaps the US treasury should consider the hoax article on the weekly world news website (Obama on New Dollar Bill) for a bit of a revamp...
- Iraqi Dinar
A few years ago I had an unexpected stopover in Bahrain and found myself in the markets in Manama haggling over an Iraqi banknote featuring Saddam Hussein. I had no intention of going to Iraq but wanted the note simply because it was big, pretentious, full of moustache and the perfect representation of a dictator...
- Indian Rupee
The Rupee, like many Indian institutions, has some British characteristics. If the Queen looks like Ghandi after a washing machine spin then Ghandi looks like Mother Theresa after a few years of passing between sweaty hands in tropical climes. Some rupees in circulation are limper than a dead mans wrist and others are so worn and battered that even Indians refuse to accept them. Despite the wear and tear, Ghandi is always smiling and with ever increasing worth, just like the country.
- Cambodian Riel
Once a giant in SouthEast Asia, the Riel revels in past Cambodian glories with a depiction of the 12th century temple complex, Angkor Wat. Still officially the largest religious structure in the world, Angkor Wat is the shining jewel in an otherwise impoverished crown. Cambodia is one of the poorest countries in the world and the Riel reflects this by acting as small change to the US dollar. At the time of writing, $1USD was worth about 4,000 riel, meaning a $1.50 meal would be paid with one dollar and 2,000 riel.
Growing Up - Doberman Style
Everybody loves puppies. It's that simple. Even people who don't really like dogs, love puppies. The problem for the latter is that puppies don't last forever. At some point your cute little four-legged friend may well develop into a gigantic, sofa-hogging drooler/snorer. Of course it depends on what type of dog you have. If you find yourself with an adorable mongrel puppy then it's simply pot luck as to how much of the sofa you lose in years to come. If you go for a pure-breed then at least you have an idea of what's to come in the future, but in reality nothing can prepare you for the seemingly overnight growth with larger breeds. When we got Sam, he was about the same size as a cat. Our Italian neighbour used to call him "Patatino" for the first few months, which would probably translate as "little potato". But by the time he was 8 or 9 months old, the first faces of fear started to appear as we walked him through the local markets. After his first birthday the dobermuscles developed and people stopped approaching him altogether. This despite having unusually floppy ears for a doberman and a full, constantly wagging tail! By his second birthday only doggy enthusiasts looked at him the same way as everyone else when he was a puppy and it's a real shame, because when it's your dog, you know that even with 45kg difference, he's still the same puppy! :)
Sam & Co. on Facebook at, Twelve Hairy Legs
Making Friends With The Hedgehogs
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| Sam & Papa-Hog |
Whilst we were living in Italy, Sam (our doberman) discovered that a family of hedgehogs had taken up residence in and around the grapevines in the backgarden. Two or three nights a week, he would catch a different member of the hedgehog clan and parade triumphantly through the garden with the spikey ball in his mouth before depositing the said hog, slightly dazed yet unscathed in a different part of the garden. Obviously it must have been a traumatic and tiring experience for the hedgehogs but they could at least recover from the evening's escapades with a daytime snooze. That was until Sam found out where they slept...
Following the bed-hog-room discovery, Sam made a point of personally inviting/forcefully bringing them to his house during the day as well as the usual evening parades. Needless to say the hogs were quite disgruntled by this unwanted neighbourly attention and shortly after a lunchtime invite, papa-hog being dropped onto the kitchen table, the hedgehog family moved into the garden next door where fending off the neighbours' cats seemed like a much more appealing proposition.
More of Sam at Twelve Hairy Legs
DoberBat in Bed
How to caption this one... "Sleeping Beauty"? "Sleeping Doberbeauty"? "Sleeping Doberbat"? Or simply "Doberbat in Bed"?
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The Sadness of Sexual Rejection
I got an email a couple of weeks ago asking about Sam's balls... Is it better to have a pup with dangly bits or say arrividerci to the plums?
Sam has all of his tackle in tact, firstly out of respect for the man-code (never cut off another fellow's balls) and secondly because many Dobermans, Sam included, suffer from Von Willebrand disease which means he could actually bleed to death if you took a knife to his sack (Potential Doberman owners beware!)
Sam has all of his tackle in tact, firstly out of respect for the man-code (never cut off another fellow's balls) and secondly because many Dobermans, Sam included, suffer from Von Willebrand disease which means he could actually bleed to death if you took a knife to his sack (Potential Doberman owners beware!)
The downside to this for Sam is of course the rejection from his ladies when his nuts are sending him into sexual overdrive. He's been trying to get laid for a couple of weeks now but both the Husky and the German Shepherd have sent him packing.
This shot was taken seconds after another toothy rejection from Taia (lying, sex-free, on the floor behind him.)
My Rajasthan Top Ten
"From the cackle of its colour-charged cities to the luminous splendour of its sun-kissed desert, Rajasthan is romantic India wrapped in gaudy royal robes... Compiling a must-see list in Rajasthan can cripple the fussy traveller..." - Lonely Planet
Deciding what to see in Rajasthan can be tough so here's my top ten sights/activities to give you a helping hand on your way...
MONKEY TEMPLE in Jaipur (Galtaji)
"Just through the gate (by the inner arch – surrounded by imitators) on the northern side of the square, the Omelette Shop claims to go through several thousand eggs a day – the egg man has been doing his thing for over 30 years. Two tasty, spicy boiled eggs cost Rs10, and an oily two-egg omelette with chilli, coriander and four pieces of bread Rs15." - Lonely Planet
"...the destination is an apt sobriquet of composite culture, where people of all faith and culture — Muslims to Naga babas', 'bagwa' or the 'jatau' sages soak in the ethos of the town."
"Travellers journeying through the desolate landscape of the unforgiving Thar desert in the Indian state of Rajasthan would know when they had reached their destination. The sky would fall to the ground and everything would become a single color – blue. Jodhpur would lie before them, opening up like a blue treasure in the desert."
Deciding what to see in Rajasthan can be tough so here's my top ten sights/activities to give you a helping hand on your way...
MONKEY TEMPLE in Jaipur (Galtaji)
" The temple complex of Ramgopalji temple is colloquially known as Monkey temple (Galwar Bagh) in travel literature, due to the large tribe of monkeys who live here. These rhesus macaques were featured in National Geographic Channel's Rebel Monkeys series and "Thar Desert - Sacred sand" episode of Wildest India Series. "
THE EGG MAN in Jodphur
"Just through the gate (by the inner arch – surrounded by imitators) on the northern side of the square, the Omelette Shop claims to go through several thousand eggs a day – the egg man has been doing his thing for over 30 years. Two tasty, spicy boiled eggs cost Rs10, and an oily two-egg omelette with chilli, coriander and four pieces of bread Rs15." - Lonely Planet
COLOURFUL ELEPHANTS Amer Fort in Jaipur
This is actually a controversial one because the elephants are simply used as novel taxis for the tourists (we walked up to the fort), but for a balanced Indian perspective on the elephant situation at Amer Fort have a look at the link above.
"The elephants at Amer are merely joyrides... So it is quite clear to me that they must be stopped. However, I am not willing to see the elephants at Amber starve to death simply because there is no employment for them forcing their owners to abandon them.
The solution is obvious and two-pronged, but I will state it anyway. We need the following:
a) The creation of a government or private sponsored facility to "retire" the elephants and look after them until they die
b) A program to re-skill and provide gainful employment the mahouts so that their families don't starve."
CHILLING HOLY BABAS in Pushkar
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/jaipur/A-trip-to-Pushkar-the-holy-abode/articleshow/8920052.cms?referral=PM"...the destination is an apt sobriquet of composite culture, where people of all faith and culture — Muslims to Naga babas', 'bagwa' or the 'jatau' sages soak in the ethos of the town."
SHOPPING WITH THE COWS in Pushkar
"Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters."
Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters. - See more at: http://saharanscot.blogspot.de/2010/10/pushkar-india.html#sthash.PeNwIzTv.dpuf
Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters. - See more at: http://saharanscot.blogspot.de/2010/10/pushkar-india.html#sthash.PeNwIzTv.dpuf
Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters. - See more at: http://saharanscot.blogspot.de/2010/10/pushkar-india.html#sthash.PeNwIzTv.dpuf
Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters. - See more at: http://saharanscot.blogspot.de/2010/10/pushkar-india.html#sthash.PeNwIzTv.dpuf
Central Pushkar is a walking heaven compared to other Indian towns. For Indian town planners, the concept of a pavement is as abstract as the smell of unicorn shit. Pushkar however has a small centre where pedestrians have equal rights with the cows, motorbikes and scooters. - See more at: http://saharanscot.blogspot.de/2010/10/pushkar-india.html#sthash.PeNwIzTv.dpuf
CITY PALACE in Udaipur
"The City Palace in Udaipur was built in a flamboyant style and is considered the largest of its type in Rajasthan, a fusion of the Rajasthani and Mughal architectural styles, and was built on a hill top that gives a panoramic view of the city and its surrounding..."
A NIGHT IN THE THAR DESERT in Jaisalmer
"Thar Desert, also known as the Great Indian Desert, is the quintessential subtropical, arid wasteland that comes to the imagination from books and movies; parched, sun scorched sand dunes stretching as far as the eye can see, only disturbed by the wind exhaling across the quiet barren plains of Rajasthan."
RAT TEMPLE in Bikaner
"The Karni Mata Temple at Deshnoke, 30 km from Bikaner, India, is one of the strangest temples in the world. The temple is home to over 20,000 rats, that not only live and dine within the temple premises but are actually worshipped by devotes who throng the temple in great numbers. These holy animals are called “kabbas”, and many people travel long distances to pay their respects."
BLUE JODHPUR from the Fort
http://www.kuriositas.com/2011/01/jodhpur-indias-blue-city.html"Travellers journeying through the desolate landscape of the unforgiving Thar desert in the Indian state of Rajasthan would know when they had reached their destination. The sky would fall to the ground and everything would become a single color – blue. Jodhpur would lie before them, opening up like a blue treasure in the desert."
TAJ MAHAL
(ok, technically just over the border in Uttar Pradesh but always on the Rajasthan tour schedule!)
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